...

Sounds like tears...
No, that's Her fear.

She screams our name every time You're near,
though close to Your ear, as if You can't hear.
Louder in time, as if it's a crime,
Maybe it is... cause it's not divine.

You pull back just to see Her,
all drenched in tears, trembling in fear.
It's not so clear, You look around...
Ya'll the only ones here.

Seat back relax, best You can,
look Her straight in the eye, seated face to face.
Suddenly it time, to set things straight.

" Darling I fear, nothing 's clear.
I know not why, You tremble in fear.
I said it before, thought I made it clear.
Said it out loud ,for all to hear.

Yeah, through Your baby blues,
I'll still be here;
And even through Your own blues,
I'll hold You near.

...

Let it take shape.

I've been up for countless nights, been gone for many,
My sanity last I saw , was lost to the wind.
I found out that lovers dream, and dreams make up lovers,
My constitution was my pain and tears, You were my sorrow.
I soon forget what I wish to say, every time You are near.
Dear I meant to say, I love You,
but it's obvious and clear,
That love 's a three legged race, and am on my own.
It's seek and it's twisted how they say it all the same,
I never thought a hundred day could go by so fast.
That's how long every year, I wait for Your love,
seems like am pledging ,my allegiance to the dark.

I seem to Love this pain and this sorrow,
now my that my life seems just borrowed,
and where once a heart seems so hollow.
Am glad, no-one can follow,
this path that I travel, cause I burnt all my bridges past
I have to hope for tomorrow.

I don't wish You to understand why I'll pray for rain,
when My world seems to be in a flood and I cannot swim.
I dont want Your saving, please leave me be,
Sounds insane but its sanity cause I still wish to Live.

*** *** ***

Today...

Today I just think I'll talk, maybe flutter these lips
and say words I meant to say.
Today I just think I'll walk, maybe let my feet take me,
to a place I never thought I'ld go.
Today I just think I'll drop, the tiresome load,
 of my past I do carry.
Today I just think I'll trust, that every thing has a purpose,
and wait till the pain goes as I smile at the rain.
Today I just think I'll laugh, out loud as I remember the pain
and the shame that never stuck.
Today I think I'll busk, in the sun and just soak up some rays
of its imminent light.
Today I think I'll flap, these dusty wings that I never thought would ever fly.

so, today I'll call my first crush, tell Her what's on my mind,
hope at all She won't understand.

If all I do say, then today would be yesterday...





Till the next time my sanity takes a break,
Kwaheri.

...

Eyes so wide, a sky once bright.
The fallen crime, these graves dug deep.
Am only human, to love You anyway.
I have seen longer nights, away from You.ere
The stars do seem to shine a bit too dim  tonight,
when I think of Your disguise.

I won't fight You, when You come all dressed in white;
I won't hide You, when You come all drenched in rain;
Cause I'll still love You, when You start to stray.

But the pain that I feel, I can bare no more.
There are tears much so real, I can not explain how it feels,
to love for the sake of Love.

I see images of You, remember Your voice;
and i start to get undone, cause I don't find it right,
You over there and me over here.
...
...

Playing tapes in my head (still one of many)

still reeling.
I rocked the blue sky still, watching as it dimmed away,
Leaving night in Her splendor, darkness mixed with soft lights,
A treat to eyes that were blinded, by the staring into madness.
I followed slowly to the ledge, of crazy town alone.
I had to flee these madness, fools who complied to gladness,
while tears pain loomed in their eyes again.

So I tred this path alone, no companion but mu soul.
I let the tears drop in silence,bread crumbs to my soul.
Dear friend don't mind my tone, the the words I say are filled with pain,
In truth my blindness, in light I vained madness,
And bowed to Queens of stone, no penance did they give me.

To God I lay my soul, in broken pieces like old gold,
that took the form of coal and muck, from the sins i bared on my back.
I pack each lie one by one, every sin i did I took,
and my cross of lead i took, through the sleeping cities,
as people walked sleeping, to hope for peace in war.

This my repentant soul, must learn these sins let go.
For remorse will kill me, Her name I have taken,
while her house I have dwelled in, a sinner full of gold and toil,
a friend to mad-men in their soil...
... ... ...

Playing tapes in my head (one of many)

Biograpia...(Auto)

Your life is a story, told to many.
The choice of when, by whom, where and why are all in Your hands.
I decide to tell my story in my own words,
My own way.

I choose to be the one who tells the truth about me.
My life through my eyes, through a thousand and one mirrors.
I decided to no-longer be a victim of people's near sighted view of who I am.
I hence decided to be ME.

Be the ME I know I Am.
For In My story...

Playing tapes in my head (one of many)

Set in the back.

It was final in a way, the sun had set;
the night did stretch forth her veil of darkness.
The evolution of man's thoughts had brought birth to lightning,
but it was yet, as imperfectly deprived of thunder.
The light that the lamps did bring forth had now been abandoned, yet in my soul I could hear the rain,
as She did her companion converse with.
The randomness of existence had been given meaning long before,
before the day My first breath did flood these mortal lungs.

So I saw it set in the back of my mind, hidden behind the debris of a mediocrity
that surpasses my own sanity.
Above the sanctity of my own existence , the closure that I seek in my own dis-functionality.
The thought of love and so called acts of love, that just stew You in disparity,
I wish to toss this thought to the world just this once.

They called me by names out of a medical journal by V.Frankenstein,
that I was pieced up into nothing-ness.
I am not Your mumbled up words, nor am I a fragment of Your imagination.
I am who I am, I am who I AM says I am.

I did this once flip this script for a moment, to make this poison less potent.
They have sput in my ears words so profane and called this nonsensical rumbles love,
I do not believe in that Your "cupid's" arrows.
When love is like a mucky stream,I shall not tred into it.
I will not join my soul to another, a promise they have made, broken and destroyed ,
a million times to make it thus reduced to dust, slowly being blown off into the distant wind.
...
Grow up You foolish bum. Get off Your lazy thrown and shed off Your crown of complicity.
Walk on, as the wind ushers in a reality of an on coming desert.
*** *** ***
Till next we meet.
Kwaheri.